Looking Back

Looking Back

Memories get distorted over time but some remain fixed in our brains even after many years. Having lived 75 years (so far) I have some vivid memories which can only be disclaimed or validated by my brother Mike.
With the holidays just gone by it seemed that the memories of Christmas’s past were flowing in and out of my thoughts more than usual. Christmas was a huge holiday when I was a child as Christmas and our birthdays were the only time that we got gifts. My mother loved all the holidays from Valentine’s Day through Christmas and they were all noted by decorations and activities but the Christmas Holidays were the big ones. Whether dad felt the same way is something I will never know but he joined in and completely supported mom to make it special.
Christmas started the day after Thanksgiving because that was when the Fairy Tale parade took place in downtown Portland. We took the bus to town and settled into our positions on the curb to watch the floats go by. Marching bands from the High Schools in and around the Portland area marched in their magnificent uniforms with the drum major in the lead. Jefferson High School had the best drum major of all who pulled the crowd into the spirit with his amusing and powerful use of the baton. Between the bands came the floats representing the fairy tales and Disney characters of the time. Dumbo, Donald Duck. Mickey Mouse, and Bambi were some making their Christmas appearance and whipping us up with Christmas dreams. The parade’s final float was the one with the “real” Santa Claus sitting up very high in his sled. I knew we were really special for Santa to take time out to be in our parade!

Sometime in the days after the parade the Cinnamon Bear stories would come on the radio and be on each Saturday until Christmas. Mike loved to listen to these stories each Saturday but I really couldn’t connect the Cinnamon Bear with Christmas. He just didn’t seem that important! The important thing took place in the first couple of weeks of December when mom would again take us on the bus to town, this time it was to sit on the “real” Santa’s lap. Santa sat on a throne like chair on the tenth floor in the Meier & Frank Department Store. We got to take the escalator up so that at each floor we were able to see kitchenwares, clothes, shoes, linens etc.etc., unlike the elevators where the operator would just announce what was on that floor in case that was the floor that had the item you wanted. I can’t remember being scared of Santa just very respectful and I don’t remember sitting on his lap, but I do remember the wonder of a toy land that never disappointed me. The Toy Land was located on the tenth floor also and I just could not imagine that their were that many toys in the whole world. Of course in those days Portland was my world and so that was why Santa and all those toys were there.

Mike and I made lists to send to Santa and sometimes we also got an answer from him. We were reminded quite often that we better be good if we wanted to have something under the Christmas Tree. Mom would bake more pans of cookies then we had all year and make plates up to give to the neighbors but there were always plenty left for us and Santa and the reindeer. The tree and decorations were put up about a week ahead of the big day along with a winter scene, a wreath and the creche. Mom played the piano and we sang Christmas Carols almost every night leading up to Christmas. I don’t remember ever getting tired of them in those days even though we sang them in the choir and the classroom at school each day starting in November to be ready for the night of the Christmas program.

Christmas Eve we had dinner, sang carols, fixed a plate of goodies for Santa and his reindeer, placing it on the hearth and then were off to bed with strict instructions that if we got out of bed Santa would not leave anything for us. I am sure they must have worn us out that day so we would sleep because we would never want to disturb Santa in his rounds. Sometime during the night we would hear bells on the roof and know that he had not passed us by.
The protocol for Christmas morning was something resembling torture. We had to make our beds, get dressed, eat something, brush our teeth and then line up in the hallway according to age. Dad would go in first to turn on the tree lights and we would hear exclamations of wonder or sometimes kiddingly, “oh, oh he must have passed us by”. We knew by now for sure Santa had come down the chimney. (it was better not to try to figure out how that was possible, it was easier to believe, but I always had a bit of questioning in my mind about that entrance) Dad would come back and take his place in the front of the line and we would slowly walk the few steps through the door into the wonder of Christmas. I was so excited, I vividly remember the doll buggy and doll beside the tree to this day, as well as the doll cradle (my uncle made), a doll house and games among many other wonderful things I first set my eyes and heart on in Meier & Frank’s Toy Land. The wrapped presents were always opened one at a time by the recipient. I did not receive all these on the same Christmas but over the years and I still remember the joy of first sightings on Christmas morning.

One hot summer day when I was ten my dad and I were sitting under the cherry tree in the back yard of 4221 NE 74th, our home until I was 12, when for some reason the subject of Christmas and Santa came up. It was then I learned who the real Santa was. The tears flowed like the Columbia River then but Christmas stayed the same through Francis and Emerson’s lives with the magic never leaving for them or for me.